to you, who reside in my heart.
It’s been a while and the thought of I’m feeling alright almost crossed in my mind. But as always, I expected too much of myself — because once again, my wish for you are being here is crawling back to me.
When the sun is below us and the world turns dark,
When the moon is chattering with those bright stars,
When ocean waves embrace the shore deeply,
When rains kiss the earth harshly,
I will miss you like the grass is looking for the dew in the morning.
I will miss you like the autumn is mourning for the greens.
I will miss you like the snowflakes that never meet the petals which blooming.
I will miss you like the way I’m breathing.
what is grief, if not love persevering?
And so when someone said grief is love with no place to go, I would believe them. Because how can someone we love is able to devastate us this bad? You rip the cage open and make me feeling empty, where the place you used to reside is now hollow like no one is ever invading.
I want to run away and forget you and this feeling, but how am I capable with that when everything reminds me of you. How you are not invading my ribs anymore but the world and all in. The road I take always lead me to you, but I’m thankful for that.
I’m thankful how selfish you are to make me keep thinking of you. I’m thankful how selfish I am to make me thinking, even if I could turn back the time, I will still choose you. I think that’s how the way love is; when we are willing to choose the path that we know it will give great pain, yet we are still able to put smile and walk on the path. When I could be so fluent with your existence as if you are my mother tongue, as if you are unable to extinct since I will speak your soul to the world endlessly.
I think that’s how the way love is.
When I’m thankful of the weight of your existence; it’s staying beneath my skin and carving on my ribs.
